You Want Kids? Read this First

Birth control.

I cried when I heard the heartbeat

I cried when he entered the world and into my hands

He cried too

Softly at first

Then loudly

For 1380 days in a row he has cried

In the morning

At night

He cries

His brother came out crying too

In the first year, a baby cries anywhere from one to four hours (probably more) a day. That is 365 to 1460 hours of crying in one year. If crying could be harnessed as an energy source, a baby could power a kegerator, a toaster oven, and a laptop all at the same time.

Crying: Green Energy on par with Solar

It is estimated that 1.3 calories are burned per minute of crying which means a one year old has burned anywhere from 28,500 to 114,000 calories wailing away in the first year of his/her life. Breast milk has roughly 20 calories per fluid ounce thus 1425 to 5700 ounces of breast milk were consumed to fuel a year of crying. Or if breast milk came in six-packs, that’s anywhere from 20 to 80 six packs.