I admit sliding the “Age” bar way to the left on dating Apps as a lonely divorced man but when half the messages the women sent back to me were Emojis I knew it was trouble. Capital T. Sure I could woo someone half my age but I’d feel like a dirtbag.

Also, the last thing I needed was someone pounding at my door with my kids trying to sleep yelling, “Why are you doing this? I love you!!!” True story. Happened to my divorced friend and I told him, “I told you so!”